The Stark Family

Personality X 2

2012-01-26T23:26:00.003-06:00

Life with two is DRAMATICALLY different than life with one. Whoa. You know, with one, you still have some time to yourself. When I first had Noah and was a new stay at home mom, it was tough for sure. But after coming off of 6 years teaching high schoolers, staying home with a sweet newborn that I loved more than life was a pleasure, a dream! And once the crazy first few months were out of the way, he napped regularly, and I actually had time to myself during the day. Not a ton, but some. However, with the arrival of numero dos, time to myself has gone down to NOTHING! NO TIME! Oh my goodness though, this number two is the sweetest (most exhausting) little person in existence. Definitely worth giving up any free time I may have treasured...of course a mother would say this!

When I was pregnant with London, Matt and I would speculate about her personality. We had long since labeled Noah as our drama king, so we were thinking that perhaps London would be more laid back. A little calmer, not so emotional, may be a little less "my word is law," than Noah. And at first that seemed to ring true. From London's first to third months of life, she was easy! She slept easily (except in the car...she hated the car!), she ate well, and she was quiet, pleasant and super smiley when awake. She wasn't shy about letting us know when she needed something, but overall, easy. A few weeks ago though, she got an ear infection, and along with the sickness seemed to come a little bit of a personality shift. Obviously, her sickness affected the way she slept and ate, but even after recovering, it was apparent that she had changed. She has started screaming when she's ticked, and I mean full out eat drum-busting screaming. The first time I heard her do this, I was with friend Erin Moore, and I almost had her pull off the side of the road so I could check for whatever it was that was torturing my child. That was just the start. We actually Ferber-ed London tonight for the first time, and boy was she heated about it. When she screams like that, Matt says he can so tell that she's a girl. Noah never screamed like she does! Well, that's one of her extremes. Her other extreme is the most joyous, heart melting thing ever. This girl has got a smile that seems to come from such a pure place of happiness, and boy is she generous with her smiles. She'll give them to anyone, any time. I just want to munch on her when she does this. It is the sweetest thing. I think she saves her biggest smiles for her daddy though. She gazes at him with her mouth wide open and both corners of it up as far as they can go, and somehow her eyes seem to glitter too. It almost makes me tear up every time I see it. A month or so ago, Matt told me that he can already see how she looks at him with such expectation, and how the weight of that feels hefty. He doesn't want to let her down, and by God's grace he won't.

It will be interesting to see how her personality develops, especially in light of Noah's. Did we have two emotionally-charged kiddos? I bet we won't have a dull moment for another 20 years!

London's Birth Story

2011-11-02T22:18:00.002-05:00

After 41 weeks of pregnancy, a couple of months of preparing for a natural VBAC labor and birth, and a week of inconsistent contractions, London finally began showing real signs of wanting to make her way into the world. On Sunday morning, August 28, Noah's 3rd birthday, I lost my "plug." And then, Monday evening, my water started to break. I slowly leaked, and Tuesday morning, after packing and preparing to be in the hospital, I made a trip into my doctor's office to find out if indeed my water was broken. And it was.

Because my body was showing signs of progression, Dr. Mimlitz let me try Pitossin, rather than just taking me in for surgery. I was thankful for this allowance, because I honestly hadn't expected it. He had been so adamant about not inducing me as a VBAC. So Matt, Mom and I made our way to labor and delivery. Around noon, I was hooked up to the IV, the Strep B antibiotic and Pitossin, and the baby heart monitor was put in place. This was the beginning of being hooked to an IV for the next three days. Being "hooked up" was certainly not in my plans, but neither was my water breaking without natural labor happening on it's own. Again, I was thankful for being able to still attempt a vaginal birth.

Contractions started shortly after the Pit was started, and I very much experienced the "stages of labor" I had read so much about. They gained strength over the hours. By around 5pm I was ready to call Hollie, my doula, to help with working through the tough contractions. Matt and I had been walking the halls, I had spent lots of time on the ball, and we had tried several positions. When Hollie arrived, we tried more positioning, and eventually, I began to get tired and wanted to lie down. After lying down, I realized that the contractions hurt worse in that position, but I was feeling exhausted. The contractions continued to strengthen and the pain escalated. They began to get so strong that I told Matt I wasn't sure I could make it to the end without some pain meds. They created this radiant pain I had never experienced the likes of before. It was incredibly un-enjoyable! He, being well versed in what to do, encouraged me by saying that I could do it, and asking me to just "make it through one more contraction." I agreed and pushed through a few more. Then the nurse came in, and I couldn't let her leave without asking about pain med options. A part of me was disappointed in opting for the meds, but at the same time, contracting via Pitossin was not in my plans and the contractions it was giving me were simply unbearable. I was starting to get a little panicy...it was really really painful. While pain options were being discussed over my head, the contractions became torturous. I was shaking, moaning and crying through each one, and I felt like I couldn't recoop well between them. I began to get scared of the next one coming. Matt would hold me tightly through each one, as I breathed hard and tried to just get through it. I've never felt anything so intense. The on call doctor, along with my nurse, a resident doctor, my mom, Debbie, Hollie and Matt stood around me as more pain med conversation was had. I recall having so many people around, but not caring because I honestly couldn't concentrate on anything other than the pain. During this conversation where Statol vs. Epidural vs. lowering the Pitossin, vs. seeing how far dilated I was was discussed, I experienced several more contractions, and I remember finally saying, can I just get the epidural? I need it! Everyone started to move into gear at that point. My amazing nurse, Valerie, checked me, and I was only dilated 1cm! My doula said she expected me to be dilated to a 6, 7 or 8 due to the intensity of my contractions, and she said she was shocked that I was only a 1. That sealed the deal for me. The anesthesiologist wasn't long and by 11:30ish I was resting much more easily. I could still feel the intensity of the contractions but without the pain. It was a really interesting sensation. I was on an Epidural drip, so I could control the amount, and I was able to still move my legs and body pretty easily. My nurse thought that my body would continue to strongly contract and hopefully push the baby down now that I was more relaxed.

Unfortunately, after 5 more hours of labor, I was still only dilated to a little over 1cm, even after consistent strong contractions, and the baby started to show signs of slight distress. Matt began to feel very uncomfortable with continuing when the chances of my cervix opening were getting less and less. During these 5 hours, my doula did some research on the cervix not opening and found that they are cases of "iron cervixes" where the body is ready and the cervix is effaced, but it will not dilate. My nurse and the resident doctor began saying the same things Dr. Mimlitz had been worried about throughout my pregnancy, and it was decided that the best move was to have a Cesarean. Matt felt like we were just waiting for the baby to become distressed, and he felt that was purposeless and irresponsible, as the consensus was that my cervix was not going to open if it had not made any progress by this point. And I agreed.

I knew in my heart that this was the answer, although the extreme disappointment brought tears. I tried; it just wasn't what God had in store. After a few moments of sadness, I resolved myself to what was ahead. I threw up a couple of times while waiting for the surgery prep to begin, and just felt exhausted after such a long day and night of labor. I could barely keep my eyes open (and didn't even try honestly) while they were prepping me. I didn't need to hear anything more from my loved ones. I didn't need to see the movement all around me. I was rolled to the operating room. I wanted to block out the upbeat music that was playing and the random conversations taking place between the nurses and doctors. I wanted to block out everything. I just wanted to be on the other side of things. I wanted the surgery to be over, and I wanted to sleep. This is one of the things I hated about the Cesarean with Noah too. Just this feeling of wanting to close my eyes and have it be over. My vision of birth was to reach for my baby and hold her close right away, while being fully aware; not practically knocked out from exhaustion and drugs, unable to even touch her.

(This is an awful picture of me, but it perfectly shows the combination of desperation and helplessness I was feeling.)

After the odd sensations of numbed pushing and pulling, I finally heard her cry! I opened my eyes as I muffled a sob and looked at this brunette beauty being lifted over the curtain. She was immediately taken to the warmer and (just like with Noah) I watched her first moments from a distance. This is the part that hurt the most; this is the part I most wanted to avoid. I longed for the ability to hold her skin to skin, but instead I felt weak and distant because of the exhaustion and all the drugs running through me. I was wheeled into recovery where Matt held the baby for at least the first ten minutes. I kept saying to him that I was afraid of dropping her because I felt so weak. This made me so sad at the time and still breaks my heart when I think back on it. But London was healthy and beautiful and here! Matt wanted to find our moms and give them the good report, but I told him I needed a few minutes to just be. I did start to feel better, and was able to hold my sweetie just a little while later. We requested a bed side admit, so London was cleaned and examined right next to us. It was nice not to be separated from her like we were from Noah. After the bedside admit, I was able to nurse her before getting moved up to our recovery room.

Praise God, our long awaited and anticipated little girl was here!
London Adele Stark, 8lbs, 8oz., 21.75''
The drugs slowly made their way out of my body, London began nursing really well immediately, and despite the disappointment of another Cesarean, we were so happy to be on the other side of 'pregnant' and ready to begin life as a family of four. Daddy, Mommy, little boy and little girl.

Time

2011-08-18T00:21:00.005-05:00

The thought hit me this week that I have very little time left with JUST Noah. The last couple of weeks I've been so focused on when this baby is going to come, that the seemingly obvious opposite to her arrival escaped me. It will never be just Noah ever again. I should cherish these last days with him. And so I have been. This week has been a week of just the two of us.

Here's the run down:

Monday we visited what might be his new "school" (more on this later), then we had a leisurely lunch where we shot his space shuttle across the table at each other for a while, hit the grocery store and then headed home. Played more that afternoon too. Tuesday, we hung out hiding, playing, talking and watching cartoons until my doctor's appointment, and today we stayed in all day (mainly due to how crappy I've been feeling, but nonetheless, in we were). We played, cleaned, talked, and made silly faces at each other at breakfast and lunch.

Not every moment has been smooth though. For instance, today we had a serious nap show down. After him getting out of his bed nine times, hitting me twice, getting his two favorite toys taken away, and getting two spankings, I won. And when it was finally time for him to get up, we were closer than ever. I absolutely love it when the Lord confirms my tactics this way. He needed some boundaries, I set them, cried while I did it, but did it, and he felt more secure with me after it was over. Sheesh, what a "nap time."

My point is that I've really connected with him this week, and I unfortunately feel like it's partly because I haven't been social. I firmly believe that Noah needs time with his friends in social environments, but there is something so special about just spending time cultivating our relationship. Talking, interacting, playing, teaching, nurturing, loving...not just rushing to get somewhere. I know I've thought about this before, and I've probably written about it too, but I've yet to discover the balance of really growing his spirit and providing activities. I thankfully do feel like the Lord is teaching me these things, but I kind of just hate having to learn them along the way. I want to know all the right things right now! I want Noah to get the best mom, and I certainly am not that. This week Christ is teaching me that it's not about how good I can be though, but how good He is, and that's where I need to look. I've already failed a million times, but that's not what He sees, and I'm hoping it's not what Noah will see either.

Rambling over, I am just really loving this week and all the time with Noah. He's growing up so fast...he'll be three in less than two weeks, and he'll also have a sister for the rest of his life in (what I hope is) less than two weeks!

Sweet, growing times.

Feeling Grateful

2011-08-07T00:23:00.001-05:00

At this stage of the game, 2 weeks out from being due that is, I more often than not feel the tendency to complain about how I'm feeling. I'm having the same ligament pain I had with Noah, and also beginning to feel anxious about going into labor. It could happen any moment, and for me, the unknown is nerve-racking. But between receiving the awesome gift from my aunt and uncle yesterday, working on my thank you cards from my baby shower, and having a really fulfilling family day with Matt and Noah, I feel like I've been remiss in my scarfy attitude.

The Lord has blessed our lives over abundantly. We live in a great city, in a good house, surrounded by sweet generous friends. We attend a solid church that feels like home, we love and are loved, we have gracious supportive families, our second child is just a few weeks away from showing herself, and Christ has given us life. Why and how do I still find room to complain?! It's amazing that the Lord is so patient with me because I absolutely do not deserve it. I am so thankful He has already forgiven me for these miserable parts of my personality and I don't have to live regretting the myriad of stupid attitudes I get. I'm so thankful for His love and graciousness to me.

Heirlooms Post

2011-08-06T00:01:00.000-05:00

I wasn't sure which of my blogs to post my most recent entry on, but I ended up choosing my Dear London site, so please jump over there to check it out. I am so grateful to have received some of my great grandmother's heirlooms from my Uncle Sandy and Aunt Pam.

Secure in His Manhood

2011-07-26T23:50:00.000-05:00

This outfit really did happen! Noah had an accident at a friends today, and I didn't have a change of clothes with me. Friend, Meri, had just given me a baby gift for London, which included these little pants. What was a mom to do? It was either this or naked! I'm sure Noah's grandfathers would have voted for naked! Ha! Meri, who is from Italy, said that no one would have batted a lash to see a boy dressed like this. Funny how different cultures can be from one another.

And PS, Matt took this picture and almost posted it on Facebook himself...he thought it was hilarious!

Toddlers Need Massages Too

2011-07-20T22:31:00.001-05:00

This is one smart little dude.
Our generous neighbor gave me a massage pad (not exactly sure what it's really called)...one of those pads that sits in a chair and massages you? Anyway, I had it sitting in our back room, and Noah took it off the chair, put it flat on the coffee table and laid on top of it. This is how I found him! Cracked me up!

He's working that control like a pro!

A Hard Day of Parenting

2011-07-17T23:23:00.001-05:00

Little bit of a rough day with this sweet boy:

(Noah, eating his self-decorated cup cake at Reese's 4th birthday party yesterday.)

Actually, a little more than rough. Everything recently is so difficult with Noah. He fights us on so many things! Nothing is easy. I feel like we've possibly been giving him too many chances to obey, so today we cracked down, and it was a day full of time outs and spankings. Just awful. Nap time was miserable too. He was so tired, but wouldn't fall asleep, and then ended up making a joke out of the whole thing by singing, and kicking, and trying to sneak off the bed, and crawling on top of me, and saying he had to go potty, and a hundred other little things that made me want to go mad. I usually don't lay in his bed with him, but I knew he NEEDED to sleep, and he would just play if I didn't lie with him for a bit. After an hour, I gave it up though. I felt defeated and disrespected. I tried to tell myself that I was letting my (almost) 3 year old make me, a 32 year old feel this way, but I couldn't help it. I feel like I'm usually pretty strong during these moments of frustration, but be it my hormones, my exhaustion level,or something else entirely, I had a hard time keeping it together. I pray tonight that the Lord would show me how to more effectively parent his behavior in a way that shapes his heart and encourages him to obey with a joyful spirit.

A Few Conversations

2011-07-14T23:15:00.000-05:00

While sitting on the toilet this afternoon:
Noah: "sssshhhhhhh..." (while holding his finger to his mouth)
Me: (whispering) "ok, what is it?"
Noah: (whispering) "there's a monster coming."
Me: "OH, really? is he a scary monster or a friendly one?"
Noah: "he's a friendly one."
Me: (still whispering) "oh good."
Noah: "mommy, ssssshhhh. there's a friendly pirate coming too."
Me: "oh, ok."
Noah: (whispering continues) "and a friendly elephant is coming too."
Me: I just laughed really hard at this point.
Noah: "sssssshhhhhh..."

While eating lunch at McAlisters with Daddy and Grams after BSF one Tuesday back in April:
Noah : "Jesus is holding me. He's a big guy, and He's not scary. He loves me."
Me: I just cried.

While sitting on the toilet right before bed time (also in April):
Noah: "Can God take me potty?"
Me: I just laugh.
Noah: "Cause God loves me." (implied: God loves me, so surely he'll take me potty.)
Me: "Yep, God does love you buddy."
Noah: "God loves me, and Daddy loves me, and Mommy loves me."
Me: "That's right sweetie, we all love you very much." (heart melting!)

GUM! And the Fourth

2011-07-04T16:11:00.001-05:00

Today I found out some very disturbing news: Matt gave Noah chewing gum MULTIPLE times over their weekend without me in Branson. "ARE. YOU. JOKING?" was my response when I found out!

I thought it odd when I came home from the store today and saw Noah with gum. But he seemed to be chewing it fine, and said that daddy gave it to him from the car. OK, so I let it go. Then on our way to the St. Louis Fair Air Show, he asked daddy for another piece. That's when I asked the question..."Um Matt, have you been giving him gum?" Matt looked immediately abashed, but then totally defended himself by saying that Noah hadn't been swallowing it, and had been keeping it in his mouth for a really long time. My response: "I DON'T CARE!" Our (almost) three year old will now be asking me for gum multiple times a day. Every time I pull it out, I'll have to give him one. I know lots of lovely people who give their kiddos gum, but it just doesn't rub well with me! My worst fear is that he will fall asleep with it and I will have to cut off all of his hair. (Which if that happens, here's how to get it out. Yes, I've already been researching this sure to happen catastrophe!) Toddler + Gum, to quote Shanna, "NO BUENO!" Needless to say, I am not a fan. However, it appears that I'm now on the gum train. Geez! OK, finished ranting now.

Today is July 4, but because of Matt and Noah's busy weekend down in Branson, we're taking today easy. We did however, make it to part of the Air Show down at the Arch grounds. Noah was tired and a little grouchy, so we didn't stay long at all. He borrowed my glasses, and I think he looks really cute in them. Gotta get this boy some aviators!

(33 weeks pregnant with baby girl in this photo.)

Reflections

2011-07-03T00:09:00.000-05:00

Watched a movie tonight where the main character loses her three day old baby. Heart breaking. And I just happen to be home by myself this weekend. Matt and Noah have gone down to the lake for the Fourth weekend. I'm too pregnant and generally miserable to ride in the car that long, so I stayed home. Bad movie choice for being home alone (which pretty much never happens) and seeing all of Noah's little toys and his room without his presence to occupy them. Made me miss him more than I thought I would honestly. These moments are kind of sad but also healthy I think. It's good to miss the people you love the most; brings out a new perspective of appreciation and love for them.

Before he left this morning, Noah told me he loved me several times and I got lots of hugs and kisses. Recently he's been pretty cuddly with me too. I think he senses the changes ahead within our family, and so he's storing up the love and attention. My theory anyway. It's weird to think that in 7 weeks it will never just be the three of us again. I'm ridiculously excited to meet (still nameless) baby girl, but also a little sad to say goodbye to our current family dynamic. Three years of just Noah and us, and before him, 9 years of just us. I feel like it's so cliche to say how blessed we are, but really, we are. God has given us a beautiful family, and the changes that keep happening are shaping our lives forever.

I wonder how Noah and this baby will click. Will he be jealous? Will he be mama's little helper? Will he try to jump on her? Will he revert and want to be a baby again, breastfeeding and all? All things to be determined very very soon!

March, April, and May in Pictures

2011-07-02T23:08:00.002-05:00

I'm pretty sure these pictures are not in order of occurrence, and my memory is so slack that I simply can not remember when we did what! So sad! I'm only 32! But, nonetheless, all of these pictures are from March, April and May of 2011.

We hung out at Foam with Mom Junket when Grams was in town. We packed the place out. Noah had a fun time, although he played mostly by himself instead of with the other kids. He tends to do this when there are large crowds.

We also toured the Kirkwood Fire Station with our Downtown Mom's group. Again, Noah is not interacting with the others, he's over in right field by himself.

No surprise here; Noah found the fire station's golf cart and wanted to drive it!

He was pretty much a pro around the station, as his Uncle Brian had given him a thorough tour of his own station. In fact, Noah got to "drive" Uncle Brian's fire truck, but these guys wouldn't even let him sit in the truck. He was quite disappointed when he found that out.

He stayed with the group long enough to snap this shot!

We had a wedding shower for Dawn and Eric instead of Community Group one night. That's one happy couple!

Noah and I got to meet Diesel for the first time. I stayed with Sarah for a couple of days, while Noah stayed at Nana and Papa's. He did come over the day we left for a bit, but poor guy was pretty sick, so we had to keep him away from D. Such a sweet baby...I loved holding him. He is so cuddly.

Matt and I got a date night and went to see Avenue Zero's first gig. They did a fabulous job and we had a great time with friends.

Griffin's first birthday was circus themed! Here Missy is sporting her clown look!

Noah found a comfy spot to hang at the party.

We also celebrated Lee's 3rd birthday at The Magic House. It was train themed and the kids had a great time.

Creating his own train...

Decorating his own cupcake...

Sharing some sort of construction vehicle with Lee...

Nana and Papa came up for Easter this year, and on Easter morning, Noah was surprised by Easter baskets! We did baskets last year too, but he was a little more into it this year, and I think he'll begin to expect it by next year. He got lots of candy and a Toy Story jet (which he played with in Target, and had a fit over when he thought I didn't buy it). Nana also got him a new blow up swimming pool for the summer. He still calls it his "surprise pool." And Pops and Grams got him a really cool recycle dump truck made out of recycled plastic and some cute clothes.

Our church rented out the Chafitz Arena for Easter morning, so we celebrated Christ's resurrection with all of our campuses. Noah held Nana and Papa's hands on the way in.

And he sat in church like a big boy. He really did a great job too...we were very proud of him. I think this was his first time through big church.

We sat near several friends from Community Group, including Jesse, Kristin and Chelsea, her first Easter.

and Todd. (The Malones too, but I don't have a picture of them...boo.)

Still loving music! He likes to watch You Tube videos of guitarists and other musicians, then he imitates them. Really adorable, and something that makes me so happy. I want him to love the arts.

Aidan's pirate birthday was a big hit! Noah is so into pirates right now, and since the party, his love and intensity about them has grown. He told me just the other day that he wants a pirate party like Aidan's, and specifically he wants a chocolate pirate cake.

Aarrggg matey!

We hit up the Botanical Gardens on one of the first really warm days of the year. I was unprepared for any sort of water activity, but the fountains were on, so I let know play around in his undies. He had a great time, but by the end of it was so tired. He's laying down in this pictures! So cute.

Victoria Vox, a good friend of Brett and Kelly's put on a concert at their house. They BBQ'd and we sat around their pool and listened to some amazing music. It was a fabulous evening. Noah enjoyed the music so much. The next day, the ottoman in the living room became his stage, and we watched more You Tube videos to see others playing the ukulele, flute and bass. The Malone's came as well, and in the picture below, Michael is borrowing Noah's conductor hat.

Lunch with good friends the Cornejo's. These hang outs come much more seldom now that Sandra is working full time again, so we treasured our time together. Noah and Saylah ate lunch all by themselves at their own table.

Noah, Daddy and Joe went to a baseball game together...Noah's first of the season.

We had a girls weekend at Andrea's lake house. It was such a refreshing and encouraging time with good friends.

I was lax in taking many pictures during these months, but I'm almost caught up, so (although I've said this in the past) I plan to be better from here on out! Noah's not getting any younger!

February in Pictures

2011-06-28T09:32:00.001-05:00

Catch up for February 2011

Twilight night with the girls. We absolutely needed Twilight themed cake pops for the occasion!

Noah and I took what is becoming our annual winter trip to Florida in February. Grams took us to a strawberry farm, and Noah had a great time. It was a beautiful day for doing such things.

We rode a tracker to the fields...

Noah carried the buckets that we filled with strawberries.

We always have to visit Boca Raton Plaza (because it is a really really good mall!), and the last few times Grams has given Noah money to throw in the fountain. I love how he's standing in this picture. So cute!

What a sweet face.

The highlight of this particular trip was our visit to Disney World. GG was able to get us in for free and she was a trooper as we dragged her around til after dark! To get the day started though, we had breakfast at Cracker Barrel.

Walking in...

Riding the tram...

Riding another tram...

Riding the train Pops promised him (with his conductor hat of course!).

Noah's first look at the magical castle!

We waited in lots of lines!

Can't go to Disney without taking this classic photo.

Celebration Parade: I think Noah was over-stimulated. He loved it, couldn't tear his eyes away, but stayed entirely silent the whole time.

One of the big highlights...seeing Woody!

More lines...

Grams rented a stroller for Noah and this is how he like to sit in it.

Pirates of the Caribbean ride: Noah said it was a little scary, but he did great!

And he got a Jack Sparrow sword.

Riding with grandma on the Alladin ride.

We found the cast of characters putting on a show. Noah had a great view from Pops shoulders.

The castle turned purple!

"To infinity and beyond!" Noah's favorite cartoon character!

He was getting so tired, he laid down on Pops shoe.

Our crew.

Grams bought Noah a Buzz Lightyear toy on our way out of The Magic Kingdom.

So tired!

Back at GG's the next day...

Chatting with Missy the Moo Cow.

Riding the tracker with Pops...

Noah snapped this picture of Pawpaw.

and gave him a kiss.

Gary and Lorrell drove over to GG's to see us for a bit.

(Picture is out of order) Noah was saying hello to Missy.

Pops had to wash off all the bugs from our road trip and he needed some help from his buddy.

This is Noah after helping Pops wash the car.

Going on a bike ride with Grams. Grams said he said hello to neighbors and dogs and sang as they rode around.

Beach time!

Ikea time! Only Noah could get his Grams to do this! (We did end up buying this tent.)

It's so hard to say goodbye!

(Out of order picture.) Pops and Noah hanging out before we had to leave for the airport.

At the end of February, we had a family photo shoot with Erica.

February 2011 - (I am 3-4 months pregnant with baby girl in these photos.)

Big Boy Bed

2011-06-15T23:46:00.000-05:00

Last week, we bought Noah a "big boy bed." I scoured the web for the style I thought I wanted, but we ended up finding a bed on Craigslist that did the job. The first night we brought it home, it was too late to put it up, and Noah was pretty sad he wasn't sleeping in his big boy bed. A couple nights later though, he helped daddy put it together. He used his screw driver...super helpful! ;) We didn't get side rails, so we stuffed the perimeter of the bed with pillows, but he didn't fall out once! And he didn't get up in the night at all either. He did however pitter-patter his way to our bedroom at 4:45AM, where he slept for two more hours. I decided that morning that that sort of behavior could not continue, or else we'd have a habit on our hands. It was awfully sweet though. So now I'm in the middle of training him to stay in bed until 7:00. Which is a bit of a challenge, but I think he's doing pretty well. I've just ordered the OK to Wake alarm clock (recommended to us by Sarah) which lights up when the alarm goes off rather than making noise. Hopefully this will help him learn when he can get up. "Look for the light Noah, look for the light." This is what I will tell him. I'm sure it will work like magic...fingers crossed!

The biggest challenge with this new change is bed time. We're continuing our bed time routine of reading, singing, praying, but now after all is supposedly said and done, he sticks his head out of the door, and yells, "I need to go poop!" or "Good night mommy, good night daddy!" or "I love you Dad/Mom." or "I'm not getting out of my bed!" or "I'm getting in my bed now." It's quite the little show, and I'm stumped as to how to stop it from happening. Hilarious sometimes, and frustrating at others. We've also started "tucking" him in. Tonight after I tucked him in, he pulled his arm out and said, "Mom, I broke the tuck, can you fix it?" Stinking adorable is what that is! I remember my parents tucking me in at night; dad always had the tightest tuck, and I loved it...looked forward to it. Felt in some way it was an extension of their love, which retrospectively, that's exactly what it was. I love passing on special things like that to Noah, and one day to this little baby girl.

I'll add pictures to this post when I upload them. I've reached my all time worst at uploading and organizing photos. I don't really understand why I'm not keeping up. One of my goals before this baby comes is to get Noah's baby book in order, so hopefully I'll get my act together soon. Just wanted to at least get some of this in writing.

January in Pictures

2011-05-26T23:04:00.001-05:00

Playing in the snow at home.

"Fixin'" things with friend, Morgan.

Sledding with Mom and Dad...mostly Dad!

Watching water skiing on youtube, and wanting to do it too! Couldn't have made his Daddy any happier if he tried! (Using swords for skis, and a lanyard for a rope.)

Saying goodbye to our friends the Matlocks.

Sarah's sweet baby shower for Diesel.

Baby Girl

2011-04-07T21:41:00.000-05:00

We found out yesterday that this little sprout growing inside of me is a girl! As most know, I was a little desperate for this news...I've wanted a girl so badly. Up until the moment the ultra sound tech said the words, I was praying for contentment and joy if the gender were boy instead. And I trust that the Lord would have given me such love and happiness for him, were he a him. For months I prayed over and over for this, and God gave me several verses that comforted me as I needlessly stressed over something I had no control over: "I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord..." "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
and before you were born I consecrated you..." and "The plans of the heart belong to man, But the answer of the tongue is from the Lord." He also showed me how small my own ideas are compared to His. I realized that this little ones life is already in God's will and ultimate plan, and how could I possibly be disappointed in something God had already so purposefully ordained? A friend confirmed this, and so I began to feel a little better, yet continued to pray for a genuine desire to desire the things of God, rather than my own ideas of what would be perfect for my life.

So after all of this worry, the moment the tech said, "how about a girl?" (her exact words), I cried, as absolutely expected. I think I said, "really?" through my tears and then asked if she was 100% sure. She said, "how about 99.9%?" and I was quite satisfied with that answer! After the ultra sound, I rushed to the bathroom and alone in the stall, sobbed for a couple of minutes while praising God for answering my prayers. I wanted a girl for various reasons, ranging from how fun it will be to buy girl clothes, to having a balanced family without pressure to have a third, to the adult relationship I wish to have with her once she is grown up with her own family. Oh, such joy!

This amazing joy was clouded a bit by our doctor's news of a Choroid Plexus Cyst on the baby's brain. He assured us that he had never seen anything come of one of these, but he needed to disclose it to us. He downplayed it so much, I honestly didn't worry much at all about it at the time. However, come to find out later that day, Matt was worrying enough for both of us. He looked it up online and of course learned the worst case scenarios. After a bit more research together that night, we were both comforted that truly is there rarely anything abnormal that comes from a CPC, and that God is in control nonetheless. The doctor wants to continue to keep an eye on it, and so we will probably have several more ultra sounds before the birth. 1 our of 100 babies have this, and so it is not a rare diagnosis. We will continue to keep it in prayer, but are trying not to worry much about it.

Baby girl, I can't wait to hold you and kiss you and know you. I am so thankful that you get to be mine, and I will love you unconditionally no matter what. Thank you God for this blessing!

A McNutt Christmas, 2010

2011-03-08T22:22:00.000-06:00

This picture was actually taken just as we were saying goodbye to my parents, but it shows the setting well so I'm putting it first!

We traveled to Gatlinburg, TN for Christmas with my family this year. It's such a beautiful area, made even more beautiful by the Christmas Day snow. One of the highlights of the trip was announcing our pregnancy to the fam. This is how we did it:

It took everyone just a couple of seconds to catch on, and then they were of course super excited for us. Unfortunately, this new little nugget made my Christmas vacation a little rough. I was sick almost the whole time, and spent a large majority of time in bed or just being a deadbeat. Made me extra sad since I don't get to see my brother and sis-in-law very often - I hated being sick when I could have been hanging with them.

To start our trip off, we had to find a Christmas tree! We found this practically empty lot at a church, and they wanted to just give us the tree!

We picked one out, and this is the moment Noah learned that Daddy is strong! Matt picked up the tree, and Pops said to Noah, "wow, your Daddy is strong" and Noah hasn't forgotten it. He reminded me of this fact just today even. Pops still wanted to pay for the tree, so we did and headed home to decorate!

We decorated the tree with the ornaments Grams brought, and here Pops is helping Noah hang one.

The next day we traveled into Gatlinburg, and then up to the mountaintop of the Appalachian Trail. This is where the bad news began for me. It was a beautiful sight, but I knew things weren't good, and I needed to put my head down. We decided that we should go back to the cabin, while everyone else enjoyed being out for a while. Ironically, getting back to the cabin was not as easy as we thought it would be. Poor Matt was trying to follow the GPS and get me to a bed as fast as possible, but we just kept getting lost! It took us forever to get back, and I knew he was trying so hard, but all the while I was just getting sicker. Oh, it was miserable! We finally made it, and I was in bed the rest of the day. I was supposed to make dinner that night (it was Christmas Eve), but my poor mom, with the help of Matt and Marsa` took up my slack.

The next morning was Christmas, and I was feeling a little better, but still not great.

Noah got to see his big gift from Pops! His very own work bench. He got right down to business.

He also got a new art easel! Which he and I both love!

And a new train set (Ruthie was very interested!). And new tracks, a new boat, race car, books, a race track...the boy got plenty of new toys for Christmas!

On top of opening his gifts, he wanted to help Uncle Ben open his!

And Daddy's too!

After opening gifts, Marsa` made biscuits and gravy, a breakfast that I had actually never had. I don't think that all biscuits and gravy meals are created equal (from what I've heard) but Marsa`s was delicious!

After the early morning festivities, I mustered up enough energy to try to have some fun with my boys in the snow. I'm glad I did.

Because I got to see this...drunk on snow!

This is a side view of the house we rented. It was a great place! Marsa` is hanging out with the pups.

Noah and Daddy in the snow.

Noah and Daddy in the hot tub, with Noah's new boat of course!

Family photo!

Since I am usually the one trying to capture all our moments on camera, and I was a little out of commission, I don't have very many pictures from our holiday together. Sad! As usual, I love seeing my family and miss them immensely. I just wish I could have enjoyed them more! It's so frustrating being sick.

It was still a merry Christmas though!

Stark Christmas 2010

2011-03-08T18:13:00.000-06:00

What a cheeser!

We celebrated Christmas with the Stark side this year a week before Christmas weekend. We spent our time together at the lake with Uncle Brian, Aunt J, Parker and Tyler, and of course Nana and Papa. We enjoyed our traditional Prime Rib dinner together and then woke up the next morning to open gifts. And gifts there were! Tons of them! These three boys (well, us adults too) are a little spoiled!

I didn't know what these were until Deb told me the boys wanted them. Oh the things I still have to learn!

Noah was much more excited about this train set than his face shows here!

All the boys wanted to play with Tyler's new truck...some mediation was required!

Aunt Ev does not approve!!!

Firetruck!

And the airplane from Papa that got immediate play time. Papa always picks out great gifts!

Parker and his bug glasses!

Enough with the gifts, let's go outside! Actually, I think we were getting ready to go to the outlet malls (the trip where I secretly bought the "Big Brother" shirt for Noah), but we let the boys play a little outside first. It was a really nice day.

I just think he looks so cute in these pictures!

...hmmmm, how much trouble will we get in if we go into the woods?

We had a great weekend with the Stark family. And although spending time with loved ones is the objective and the most important aspect of holidays together, I can't NOT mention that this was the year of the Cuisinart Food Processor, purchased by my MIL for me for a crazy, amazingly good price! Thank you Deb...I love it! We also appreciate all the work that goes into to having all of us down at the lake.

So after the Christmas celebration, but before heading back to St. Louis, we stopped by Uncle Brian's fire station.

Noah is in his own little personal heaven.

He even got to try on a real fireman's hat. It was a little heavy!

This boy loves his Uncle Brian!

Brian made Matt try on all his gear to get a feel for it.

This is about the time when Matt realized he is quite comfortable behind a desk.

Noah: "Can I drive again?"

Uncle Brian: "Anything for you buddy."

And how about some Oreos to top off the experience? Guess where Noah wants to go every time we go to Springfield now? I wonder why! Time of his life. Thanks Uncle Brian!

Noah's First Super Bowl Party

2011-02-06T22:49:00.000-06:00

A couple of bullet points about Noah's first Super Bowl party experience:

He kept getting it confused with a birthday party. Anything with the word "party" in it, must be a birthday. In fact, at one point we sang, "happy birthday to football, happy birthday to football..."
Noah does not like it when people yell and get really excited about a good or bad play. In fact, it scared him to death. Especially Pete, who is at least 6'5 and had a cheese hat on that Noah just couldn't quite get used to.
He REALLY liked the half-time show.
He REALLY liked the candy bar that was available at his height.
He was so tired by the time we left that he didn't want to leave. He was saying things like, "but I don't want to go home." "The football party is not over!" There was no reasoning with him either. He absolutely insisted that "he didn't have fun" and "the football party was not over!" We were like, "um buddy, if you didn't have fun why do you want to stay?" Reasoning with an exhausted 2 1/2 year old is totally pointless, of course. Poor kid crashed once we got him in bed.

Sushi with Edward

2011-02-04T22:14:00.000-06:00

As if the day could have gotten any better, amazing friend, Shanna, pops out with this for my bday gift! Yep, that's exactly what it looks like...an Edward doll from Twilight. I got her the Shake Weight for her birthday and she got me Edward! She wins, hands down! Matt says, "Hey this is going to be a collector's item. Don't take it out of the box." This is why I love this man. He could mock or roll his eyes, but he just quietly supports (perhaps "supports" is too strong of a word), condones rather, this little pop obsession I have going! Shanna, you are hilarious. I bow down to your wit.

My afternoon continued with sweet words from friends and family. I got an awesome call from my nephews singing happy birthday, and later one from my little bro, Ben. I also got a lovely card from my bro and one from my parents that included entirely too much shopping money! But, I'm sure I won't have any trouble spending it! Oh, and last weekend, Deb and Steve gave me a beautiful butter dish and oven mitts from Anthropologie! My butter dish looks so pretty on my counter. Thank you family!

Noah gave me another sweet gift: as I was putting him down for his nap: he asked me to put my hand on his ear. He's never verbalized it like that before, although he has just moved my hand to the side of his face when I rock and sing to him before putting him in bed. I love that he loves my touch.

I also got a pretty good nap in; which ended suddenly when this 2 1/2 year old of mine appeared naked and laughing beside my bed. WHAT? How did you get here?! Why are you naked?! I didn't really need an answer to either question, since it was obvious that he had climbed out of his crib (for the first time) and stripped because he had had an "accident." Not sure why he was laughing, other than he was just really proud of himself, and he likes to be naked. We snuggled in bed for a little while, before he requested a snack.

Soon it was time to get ready for dinner. I could have found a sitter, but decided just to keep it a family event. The Gourley's and Matt Harris and daughter, Blaire met us at Wasabi, where Shanna provided tons of laughter with the aforementioned Edward doll. She also picked up cupcakes from The Cup for dessert. Such a thoughtful friend! Noah was very interested in eating with the chop sicks, and he thoroughly enjoyed the edamame, which made me very happy! Good, relaxing time with good friends. Perfect ending to a wonderful day.

Feeling Loved at Age 32

2011-02-04T14:38:00.001-06:00

(photo credit)

I'm taking a departure from my myriad of catch-up blogs to document today, because it's only 12:30 and although I haven't left the house, it's been a wonderful day. So many special moments, I have to write them down.

As I told my BFF on the phone this morning, this was the first birthday that I've woken up NOT thinking, "hey, today is my birthday." In the past, it's been an immediate thought! I was, however, quickly reminded by my sweet boys who came into the bedroom singing "happy birthday to mommy!" I wasn't feeling great though (morning sickness), so Matt occupied Noah downstairs while I laid in bed a bit longer. Special moments #1 and #2! While lying in bed, I received the most encouraging and loving text from a good friend. Special moment #3.

When I finally made it down, I was greeted with an array of wrapped gifts. Noah "helped" me open them (meaning he completely opened each of them!). My Mr. had shopped at one of my favorite stores, Anthropologie, and picked out several lovely items. He did a fabulous job, but really more than what he got me, I just love the fact that he knew what store to go to. He knows what I love! This is huge! Of course he's proven this before, but it never fails to make me feel truly known. And is there really anything more special than feeling known and still loved regardless? Special moment #4.

Then he offered to make me breakfast, which I sadly passed on, as I was still not feeling 100%. Still, really nice though! Then my mom called, and then my dad, and then Deb, then my bestie, then several other friends...and oh my goodness; I just feel loved! Special moments #5 -#10.

Amidst the calls was some gushy love texts between me and Missy. That's one lady who treats her friends over-the-top! (I actually have a whole blog post planned for this one, so to my two readers (mom and deb), stay tuned!) She has been such a blessing to me since we were introduced. This lovely girl got me an amazing gift that came along with wonderful words of affirmation and overwhelming kindness. Special moment #11.

THEN, (yes, there's more) I received an email from my dad, that made me tear up (shocker, there, as I'm usually so stoic...yeah right.) He took a picture of a page from his Bible where I had scribbled as a toddler, and his message along with it said, "I just turned to this page in my Bible where my Punkins autographed it 30 years ago. Today, I'm much happier to have it. I love you! Dad"
Special moment #12! Wow! This one just might take the cake.

Somewhere in between all of this, I checked my inbox to see it filled with Facebook messages wishing me a happy birthday. If facebook is good for nothing else, it's making you feel cared for on your birthday.

After writing all of this I feel a little 'braggy,' which is not my intention at all. I feel humbled and grateful to have so many wonderful people in my life and I just don't want to forget any of it. Amazing family, sweet, caring friends and a husband and son who love me despite me being me! The day is only half over and there is still so much loveliness to look forward to. What a great birthday!

Christmas Tree Time!

2011-02-02T22:49:00.000-06:00

The second Thanksgiving is over, my husband knows what must be done! In order to get maximum enjoyment time out of our Christmas Tree, it is imperative that we get it up ASAP! Especially on years that we travel for the holiday. My love of all things Christmas has been officially passed down to Noah (with no manipulation on my part at all!), and he was so excited to get the tree, decorate it (or rather see it be decorated) and turn the lights on each day. After we picked out the tree (from Ted Drews, where we also enjoyed a Pumpkin Pie Concrete that rocked our world,) we went home, warmed up Apple Cider and turned on Polar Express, and I decorated! The boys were mesmerized by the movie, and it ended up being one of those magic, sentimental nights moms like me dream about. So special. Noah was so sad to see the tree go the second week in January. I told him that it was dying and that we would get a new one next Christmas, and he just kept saying, "but it's not dying!" And even though we're a couple days into February now, he still asks about it and still requests that we sing "Jingle Bell Rock" at bedtime. My kid is a sucker for Christmas just like his mama! I couldn't be happier!

Baby Number Two...Bring It On!

2011-02-01T22:00:00.000-06:00

This little $.99 pregnancy test (from Sandra's base grocery store...thank you Sandra!) brought me so much joy!!! Matt and I had been trying since August to get pregnant again, and being the impatient person I am, I was starting to be pretty bummed about it taking so long. (I even feel bad saying "so long" when I have friends that took years to get pregnant.) I took this test on Monday morning, Decemeber 20th, but I had a huge hunch the day before that I was preggers because I woke up, was three days late, and felt oddly awful. I knew it had to be! I was sure enough to want to tell Matt's family (that we were staying with that weekend to celebrate Christmas...blog to come), but Matt insisted we wait until we were sure. I was sad to not get to tell them in person, but understood. It would have been really crappy to get them all excited, and then have to say, "whoops, sorry, I was mistaken." I could hardly wait until Monday morning to take the test, but I did! I left it on Matt's sink for him to check it out. The line seemed faint to me, but he agreed that it was positive.

OH JOY!!! I'm so thankful for this baby coming! I had such a wonderful time (minus the aches and normal pregnancy junk) being pregnant with Noah, and I have just been really excited about going through it again.

However, (there has to be a but), this time around is not proving quite as smooth-sailing as the last. I've had morning sickness on and off since that Sunday I thought I was pregnant. Sometimes, it's paralyzing, but most of the time, it's just enough to make me feel like not doing anything. And the exhaustion has been a little disturbing as well. I was definitely really tired with Noah, but this little one is literally sucking the life out of me. Sometimes I have to lie down after putting on makeup or taking a shower. Like I just ran a marathon or something. It's kind of ridiculous. I'd love to have a girl, and it's hard not to think, "well this pregnancy is so different, it must be a girl!" But I really don't want to let my mind go there. I pray every night that the Lord would make me genuinely content and even happy if it's another boy. And I think I will be, but it doesn't mask the fact that I'd still love to have a girl. We'll find out April 6th. Seems so far away!

We were able to wait a few days to tell my parents in person over Christmas. Here's how we did it:

I actually bought this shirt when I was with Debbie and Janet at the outlet mall in Branson the weekend before. I had to be really sneaky to do it without them seeing. I wanted so badly for Noah to wear it upstairs that Sunday morning at the Starks, but alas, I was vetoed! He did get to wear it for my fam though. It took them a few seconds to catch on, but they did, and of course everyone is so happy for us!

Thank you God for this second miracle and for blessing our family with another child. We pray constantly for your guidance and direction in our lives and for the salvation of our children. Give us wisdom and faith in your plan for our lives. Thank you for this baby. Protect him/her as he/she grows.

Give Thanks 2010

2011-02-01T21:16:00.001-06:00

Thanksgiving this year was a day filled with some traditional, some non-traditional and good times with family and friends.

The morning started off with these homemade babies:

Which were a terrible traveling-breakfast idea actually! We were meeting the Gourley's at the St. Louis Downtown Thanksgiving Day Parade (an annual tradition since last year), and Shanna was bringing the savory and me the sweet. These were quite difficult to eat standing on a sidewalk though!

The morning was a wet and cold one, but we stuck to our plans and met on the corner as planned. The kids were bundled and Aidan was in his element, but Noah and Reese weren't the happiest campers.

Reese just wasn't feeling 100%, and Noah was afraid of some of the floats. Matt is comforting him in this one, while Daryl cracks up.

We got in some good family pics.

And then Noah decided perhaps the parade wasn't so bad after all, once candy started being handed out!

The Gourley's had to head out in order to prepare for their lunch, but we stuck around to see Santa. It started raining harder so we found an awning to stand under. Santa finally came, and we were out of there.

We got back home in time for Nana and Papa to arrive. We relaxed and did some non-traditional cooking, since we had just had the big Thanksgiving meal the weekend before down at the lake with Brian and Janet, the boys and Nana and Papa. I thought I'd try a few new sides with just a turkey breast. WILL NEVER DO THAT AGAIN! I mean the food tasted just fine, but it just wasn't Thanksgiving! I was so disappointed at my choice to do non-traditional. Who cares if we had just had it! Thanksgiving only comes once a year!

Sadly, I don't have any pictures of the afternoon with Nana and Papa (so Deb if you have any, please send them to me!).

After a nice, low key afternoon we met up with the Gourley's again at The Chase to see Tangled. I think this may be my most favoirte picture of the entire year!

This was a 3D movie, so glasses were imperitive. Noah loves his and still wears them to this day! This picture is so perfect of our little ones and their personalities. LOVE IT!

Shanna bought the kids popcorn, and they all sat ready for the movie...which was really cute by the way! The last picture isn't the best quality, but proves that Nana and Papa were with us!

Noah ended up sitting with us most of the time, but he really liked the movie. We said our goodbyes to our Thanksgiving partners in crime, and went home for homemade peach cobbler! Yum! Another non-traditional, but this one worked.

The next day, Deb and I shopped till we dropped, while Steve traveled north to see his mom. He brought back this tractor, and Noah has talked about it since.

Aarrrrgg Matey!

2011-01-23T16:16:00.001-06:00

Another catch up...

We spent Halloween 2010 in Springfield with Brian and Janet and the boys. Noah was a pirate, Parker was Peter Pan, and Tyler was Captain Hook. We spent the evening at Boulevard doing Trunk or Treat. It took a little bit for Noah and Tyler to get into it, but once they figured out that candy was being handed out freely, they got their little acts together! And all three of the boys ended up with tons of candy! It was our first year having to deal with the candy issue. We of course let him have some, we "shared" some, and some of it got thrown out! After trunk or treating we went inside the church where there were games and bouncy houses set up. The boys had a blast. On one of the bouncy things, there was a steep incline, and Noah couldn't quite manage it himself. His cousins were there to rescue him though. They pushed and pulled until he made it to the top, and then they slid down together. Such teamwork and so cute! On our way out, they wanted to play on the playground, so we let them a bit. There were some costumes that Noah thought were scary, so he started calling it "the scary playground!" He's so sensitive sometimes and such a little monster at others. Keeps me guessing I suppose!

California, I Love You

2011-01-22T22:42:00.000-06:00

Again, so mad at myself for not blogging about our San Diego trip sooner, because now, lots of little details have escaped my memory! I'll do my best though!

It was our first real vacation as a whole family. Just me, Noah and Matt, not going to visit family, but going to a place none of us had ever been before. None of us had ever been to California, and we found it to be wonderful! The weather was beautiful, the scenery was gorgeous and the resort we stayed in (courtesy of Matt meeting his goals at work) was spectacular! Noah called our room "our San Diego house."

Flying with Noah is a totally different experience when Matt is there with us! The flight went smoothly and Noah behaved quite well! We left St. Louis very early so that we would arrive in CA early. Great idea, except we all ended up being exhausted since we had been up since 3:30am. That plus the time difference made for an early bedtime that first night. Before we hit the hay though, we ate a wonderful lunch at the bayside restaurant at the resort, took Noah to a local playground, got settled in, met up with Gary and Marilyn, swam a bit and then attended the Allstate Welcome Reception, which was equipped with a kid's table and delicious food. I was quite impressed! Noah however was wiped and fell asleep on Matt's shoulder while we were saying our goodbyes at the reception.

The next morning, Noah was up pretty early (5am CA time), so Matt snuggled him up in our bed, and they watched cartoons for a while. I continued to sleep! This began a morning ritual for the remainder of our time there. I was actually happy Noah was staying on Central time, so I didn't have to re-train him once we got home. We had an amazing breakfast at a local cafe, and then spent the whole rest of the day at the San Diego Zoo with Gary and Marilyn. It was such a great time! G and M are such wonderful people, and they totally took the role of stand-in grandparents for Noah! Noah fell in love with Mr. Gary. It was the cutest thing.

Noah and Mr.Gary are flying here. Noah could get Mr. Gary to do anything!

Towards the end of the day, Noah was spent, but didn't want to be held by mommy or daddy. Oh no, it had to be Mr. Gary (whom we actually lovingly refer to as Uncle Gary behind his back)!

We finished off the day with dinner at a restaurant (can't remember the name) in the Gas Lamp District of San Diego. Such a fun day with Mr. Gary and Mrs. Marilyn!

The next day, we explored a little more of the area. We started with breakfast at The Broken Yolk, which we had heard a lot about! Next, we drove up to La Jolla and stopped at a few different beaches. Not to swim though, it was a bit too cold! Noah loved running around on the shore. We also saw sea lions, but surprisingly, Noah didn't seem to give a flip about them. Matt and I were a little disappointed in his lack of enthusiasm, but we figured he just needs to be a little older to be intrigued by them. They were out on rocks, so you had to look hard to make them out. He was just more interested in walking by himself, than looking at anything.

We headed back to the resort for naps. We only had a one room, room, so we shut the tapestries, turned out all the lights, and even Matt and I crawled in bed, in order to give Noah the greatest chance of falling asleep. Of course the child did not sleep though. He tried several things to get us to get him up. My two favorite tries were: "mommy, I need to tell you something" and "daddy, I need a hug." That kid is stinkin' smart and hilarious. Matt and I had to stifle our laughter. We gave it an hour, and then went swimming! There was a pool and a large hot tub, and Noah preferred the "warm pool." It was too chilly to be in a non-heated pool (in my opinion) but there were still plenty of people swimming. That night we had another Allstate dinner to attend, and again, I was super impressed! The meal was delicious, and they had a band and all the kids tore up the dance floor. It was adorable to watch.

And here's where my memory has totally failed me! We had a third full day, but I can not for the life of me remember what we did. I'll ask Matt, but he's sleeping now. So perhaps I'll be editing this post in the near future. How pathetic is this?!

On our last full day in San Diego, we took a trolley tour, which allowed us to get on and off the trolley all over the city. We explored all the main areas of the city, and Noah was over the moon about riding on the trolley. He especially enjoyed looking at all the ships docked on the bay.

We ate delicious mexican food that night at one of the little nooks of the city (again, can't remember the name! Ah!). The next morning before our flight, we ate at the brilliant cafe we had found the first morning, and then drove around looking for antique stores (none of which were open yet).

Overall, it was a wonderful family vacation. Even though he couldn't exactly voice it, I know Noah had an amazing time because he got mommy and daddy all to himself without any of the normal distractions of daily life. We were able to really enjoy each other's company and relax in the pleasure of just being together.

Did I mention that I would live in San Diego in a heartbeat? It was so earthy and friendly and beautiful! Loved it.

Brian and Janet's October Visit

2011-01-22T21:35:00.000-06:00

I am going to start trying to catch up on blogging! I've been dreadfully awful about it for the past few months, and feel like I haven't written down things and now will never remember them! Awful! Here's a post I started, but never finished... Of course I don't remember the tiny details that make memories, so the pictures will have to tell the story.
Brian and Janet and the boys came up to visit us in October. It was the first time they'd seen our new house. It was SO nice to have an actual room for them! The boys are playing so well together now, and I expect that to just continue to escalate as they all grow older. Parker is such a caretaker, and Tyler is the wild man setting the standard of danger! Noah loves his cousins so much...he talks of them constantly and has a blast when he's with them.

I. AM. HOT.

2010-12-08T22:46:00.000-06:00

I . AM. HOT.
I. AM. TIRED.
I. AM. SITTING.
I. LIKE. GRAPES.
I. AM. PLAYING.
I. AM. TWO.

Over a month ago I started this post. Noah was going through a "statement" phase. It was hilarious, and I've tried to remember a few of the things he would often declare. I've really been slacking on keeping up with blogging, but I figured better to post a little than nothing. Noah is speaking really well now, so this phase has passed. I can actually have a conversation with him now, which is really fun.

Weekend with Friends, Part 2

2010-11-03T17:06:00.001-05:00

Saylah and Noah looking anxiously for the tractor that will take us to the Eckert's Pumpkin Patch!

We went with friends, Alejandro, Sandra and Saylah to pick pumpkins.

These two ran around the pumpkin patch like it was the most fun thing on earth! They were hilarious. Noah tried to pick up pumkins, and he would say, "it's heavy," and he would always draw out the word "h-e-a-v-y." So funny! Miss Saylah followed him everywhere and mimiced everything he did. He's not always the best example, so I began to get a little nervous when he darted out into an empty and immense corn field. Matt had to chase him down, and luckily Saylah was wise enough to know that she probably shouldn't follow him this time!

Fast boy, faster daddy, and smart chica!

After the pumpkin picking (we actually didn't get one, as I had already purchased two of them!), we headed to the fun farm. Our kiddies were still a little small for many of the activities, but they still had a good time.

After the fun farm, we had lunch and walked through the farm grocery store. Saylah pushed around her own cart in the store.

Great Sunday morning with our friends! Nothing more "fallish" than going to the pumpkin patch!

A Weekend with Friends, Part 1

2010-10-17T21:59:00.003-05:00

Friday night we caught up with the Gourley's and Rappaports. Now that Shanna is a working woman again, we only have the weekends to hang out. It's great for her, but sad for me (and Jenn)! We had a kid friendly dinner at Fuddruckers and then spent a little time at the Magic House. Fuddrucker's has a game room that we let the kids play around in before dinner. This is one of the only times you will see a gun in my son's hand (that is until I'm completely overrun by Matt, Steve, Brian and Janet)! Cute picture though, right?

The Magic House had a "Reduce, Reuse, Recycle" themed display. Noah enjoyed driving the Smart Car and the Recycler Truck. Really, because they had steering wheels, certainly not because they were environmentally friendly!

Mmmmm...apples!

Next, we worked on composting.

Then he used the compost to fertilize the garden!

He worked on recycling experiments.

I love this little cutie!

Next, we hit up the Legislative and Judicial Branches, along with President Obama's office. All the boys were anxious to speak into the microphone in the courtroom, and as cute as Noah was, Aidan won the entertainer award by boldly singing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game!" He's such a ham! Abe, Jude and Jenn can be seen behind Aidan as he makes his presence known!

Saturday morning, we bundled up and took a walk to the park. We walked around the Farmer's Market, let Noah play on the playground, and then we attempted to join the Malones in a little soccer practice. Noah, however, was more interested in picking up the soccer ball with his hands, and then losing his mind when he got knocked down. We didn't force it. Matt ended up just letting him roam the grounds, which made our little wanderer extremely happy! We ran into several friends in the park too. I love living in a place where we run into people we know. St. Louis continues to feel more and more like home. I'm really digging that feeling!

Tomorrow, Pumpkin Patch!

Jamaican Me Crazy

2010-10-16T21:52:00.002-05:00

I imagine that a "resort" vacation isn't for everyone, but if all you want is to relax, it's the thing to do. I have never had a vacation like this! It was incredible!

On to the pictures...

We saw this sign on our way out of Montego Bay. Hilarious!

This was the view from our balcony. See that pool down there? It was actually a hot tub that we spent a couple of rainy afternoons in. Lovely!

This was the view from our side balcony.

This was the view from our front door. I took this picture our first night in Jamaica. We were stunned by the beauty. We actually walked out on the beach, and one of the resort photographers caught us and roped us into an impromptu photo session. He made us do some of the cheesiest poses, including creating a "heart" with our arms, and holding our fingers so that it looked like we were pinching the sun. We were laughing the whole time! We didn't order any of the photos! (mainly because they wanted an arm and a leg for them.)

One of the special dinners out on the beach side patio. I had a lobster salad...it was delicious! Unfortunately my throat was hurting pretty badly on this particular night. This was the night of the whiskey!

And here goes the shot of whiskey! It was absolutely awful! My throat felt better for a few minutes afterward though...mainly because it was burning so much, I couldn't feel anything!

Later that night, we walked to the resort theater. The talent was...interesting. Now, when Simon from American Idol makes one of his, "you sound like resort karaoke" comments, I will know exactly what he means.

It gets worse though. Matt was literally dragged on stage and made to dance with this tribal group. Poor poor Matt. I could do nothing but laugh and take pictures!

These beautiful peacocks roamed the grounds. They were so lovely and tame.

This is the place where we spent a large majority of our time! This pool was incredible! A swim up bar, umbrellas, huge beach towels, the ocean literally steps away, employees walking around serving water and specialty drinks, my book, my iPod, Matt beside me, a little sun tan oil mixed with the sun block (of course) - it was majestic! I miss it just reminiscing.

Just about every afternoon around 2 or 3 o'clock, it would rain. We generally stayed at the pool until then, and once the rain started, we'd head over to "Bayside" for their immense lunch buffet. This was not your typical Shoney's buffet. It was fresh and massive and delicious. My favorite part of these lunches was the dessert - banana fosters! Made fresh right in front of us! One of the best desserts of my life, I kid you not! We always sat outside. I didn't want to miss a second of the landscape. It was lovely to watch the rain during these lunches. After we finished eating, we would either read, chat with new friends, or grab a daiquiri and make a run for the hot tub!

A few of the mornings we went diving, which was included in the price of our "all inclusive." Diving is so expensive, so we wanted to take full advantage of this inclusion. The water was clear and beautiful. Before our first dive, we took a refresher course since it had been a few years since we'd been diving. This was when we realized that Jamaicans have a whole different philosophy on time management! Our instructor spent over an hour trying to configure our equipment while we sat and waited. I tried really hard not to be annoyed! It did get better.

I only dove twice because of my sinus issues. I hated being sick while I was there, but I tried to not let it slow me down too much. After feeling pain in my forehead after my second dive though, I decided I better stop. Matt dove once more without me, while I read and soaked up the sun poolside.

We also were able to sail, kayak and water ski. Matt and I loved sailing! We wish we had more opportunities to do it. We'd both really like to learn how to actually sail. I'm not sure steering a Hobie Cat around a bay qualifies!

On the dive boat out to the reef.

The resort offered several restaurant choices each night. We tried each of them while we were there, and developed a couple favorites. Eleanor's was one of them, so we went twice. The food was superb, as was the wine!

This was just another one of the magnificent views.

On our last night, the resort threw a beach party. They set up dinner on the beach, and after dinner a DJ set up and got us dancing. We ate and danced with new friends. We were literally one of the last couples to leave. Afterward, we went back to our room, changed into our bathing suits and took a swim in an attempt to savor our last night in Jamaica. It was serene and I have to say, straight out of a movie! We were the only two in this huge, underwater lit, pool. Such a lovely memory!

Goodbye Jamiaca! You were everything I'd hoped you'd be and more.

“Grandchildren are the crown of the aged…” Proverbs 17:6

2010-09-20T21:27:00.000-05:00

Guest Blogger: Sandy "Grams" McNutt

On September 14, 2010 at the Miami International Airport Buz and I said goodbye to Noah as he left with his mommy and daddy to head home to St. Louis. After spending a week with us in south Florida my heart felt a little empty as I watched him go through the security line continually waving goodbye to us. We were happy Evie and Matt made it back safely and reunited with Noah, but sad to see him go! Parting is such sweet sorrow…

…our adventure began on Tuesday, September 7 with Noah and me (grams) flying from St. Louis to Ft. Lauderdale. A great idea was shared with me from a fellow grandparent and good friend – her advice, take him into the airport store and allow him to pick out a toy and a treat. Advice, I may add that was wise. Noah chose a Nemo and Dora coloring and sticker book and peanut butter M & M’s.

Airport security allowed Evie to go to the gate to see us off; needless to say Evie was having a hard time saying goodbye, but Noah was all smiles and was happy to fly on an airplane, so no tears were shed (that is unless Evie shed some as she left us). Noah was an angel during the flight, other passengers took notice and even commented on how great he was. I was a proud grams!

noah would fit in an overhead compartment!

watching the big planes!

noah and grams boarding the plane

I had many plans for the week, Coconut Cove water park, Green Cay Wetlands, Sugar Sand Park, and of course, the beach, but unfortunately I was sick, so therefore we spent more time at home than I had originally planned, but still Pops and I managed to get in a few fun activities. Our week went as follows:

Wednesday, September 8 – Noah and Pops went to the Morikami Park and played on the playground

Thursday, September 9 – Pops hooked the hose up to the waterslide and the fun commenced!

Friday, September 10 – Noah, Pops, and Grams went to the ocean – waaaater!

'cool dude'

helping pops with a sand tunnel

Saturday, September 11 –Noah and Pops went grocery shopping and later Pops walked him to the Fire Station where Noah got to sit in the fire truck (sadly we lost the photos of this event)

Sunday, September 12- Church and Church dinner

Monday, September 13 – back to the ocean

noah loved the waves

sand sculpture of polar bear - delray beach

We shared many sweet and funny moments with Noah. Here are some of the highlights! Every morning he greeted either his Pops or me with a cheerful “good mornin’!” One morning right after breakfast he looked at me and said, “What are we gonna do today, Grams?” He was sitting in my lap eating an apple one afternoon and we were chatting, I was telling him, “Grams loves Noah, Pops loves Noah, Mommy loves Noah, Daddy loves Noah”, I go on to name the rest of the family. Noah turns his head and looks at me with those big blue eyes and states, “Noah loves apples” cracked me up! Another day Noah walks up to me and out of the blue says, “Grams, I need a hug!” Oh my goodness, that was a sweet, sweet hug – you don’t think he has me wrapped around his little finger do you? He is such a joy to watch while he is playing – what a great imagination God has given him. “Choo Choo, all abroad”, says he when playing with his train. His pops is very impressed that at 2 he knows his colors. Of course, once pops found out he could name his colors he constantly asked him the color of the item he was playing with and Noah would always respond, “that sa red” or that sa blue or that sa green,” and on and on it would go. He would get it right most of the time, and when he didn’t we would say try again, and he would. Noah and I were coming out of Target one afternoon when he states, “I wuv unca ben and ant sa sa”. Of course, I could hardly wait to call and share this with them – ant sa sa said that made her day! His mommy does such a great job of keeping him informed about his family even when he doesn’t get to see us often.

ottoman turned into a boat "all aboard"

Noah loved playing with his farm!

Noah is getting great at stalling techniques as well. Whenever pops would need to leave, Noah would go into this routine, it goes something like this, “jipper, jipper, jipper, jipper, …and so, ummmm”, jipper, jipper, jipper, jipper, jipper, … and so, ummmm” and on and on it went!

Noah’s mommy has been teaching him to count in Spanish, so I continued working on that. We would count his toes and I would ask, “Noah, do you want to count in English or Spanish?” Spanish was always his choice. After counting, he would state matter of fact, “I have ten toes.” We tried to teach him a couple of other Spanish words, and one day as I was taking him to meet pops for lunch at “chick-o-le”, he blurted out as we parked, “adios amigos!” He is full-up with personality!

During his stay the US Open was on, which I love, so needless to say, especially since I was sick we were watching quite a bit of tennis. Noah began to say, “I wanna watch tennis”, so on the first morning back with his mommy and daddy as he was lying in bed with them he states, “how about watch some tennis?” (maybe we had tennis on a little too much).

There were so many funny little things he did while with us. He is fascinated with tunnels so every day we would get out his blocks and build him a tunnel to go over his train tracks. With same blocks he wanted pops to build him a high tower, which he would then knock over with glee. He liked to play on our bed after his bath, get behind the pillows and pretend it was a car, and we had to put two car doors on either side (pillows), this was a must. We would then continue to play on the bed with many giggles and laughs, we would pretend we were sleeping and snoring – listening to a 2 year old pretend to snore is hysterical! But this was a ritual we did every night. One night while playing on the bed Noah had a pretend guitar, which he was playing. He asked his pops to sing, so his pops commenced to sing a John Denver song, ’Life on the Farm’ . Noah loved this and asked him to sing it over and over – so picture in your head a 2 year old playing a pretend guitar with a grown man singing to his tune! Such sweet memories!

Noah in his 'car'

dribin` the 'car'

…and then Tuesday, September 14 came and we packed up Noah’s things, put in him the car and headed to Miami International Airport. We arrive and as we are walking around waiting for Matt and Evie, Noah asks his pops over and over, “what we gonna do today pops?” pops answers over and over, “we’re gonna get on an airplane with mommy and daddy and fly home!”

We love you and miss you Noah!

Thanks to Pops and Grams for taking care of our Noah for the whole week we were gone...I was at peace knowing he was with you both. And thanks to Grams for recording all of these moments! I love this post!

Prayer on a Plane

2010-09-20T08:50:00.000-05:00

O dear God, You sing to me, You speak to me through your created beauty. I can do nothing but lift my hands to you in worship, in awe. You are good to me. Why do you love me so? I bow my head in worship. Why can I not stretch my hands higher to you? I'm so bound. Cleanse me. Your love for me is a symphony of graciousness. I fall to my knees O God. I hope in you. I want to yearn for you. Your music awakens my heart. Move me constantly God. The ebb and flows are stifling. I want to yearn for you Jesus. Only you. You stretched your arms for me on the cross, so now I stretch my arms to you in praise. Thank you for saving me from myself. I am incapable. "May I never lose the wonder of the cross." The chasm between me and you was gaping wide. You are my bridge to life. Help me believe Jesus. You satisfied the wrath I deserve. I stand in your death Christ. Your ocean of love. I'm no longer held by my own sin. "You command my destiny." I can never be pulled away from your grip. Hold tight Lord - I am so prone to wander. Holy Holy Holy are you God Almighty.

Greek Festival 2010

2010-09-18T22:49:00.000-05:00

Good times at the Greek Fest this year with our friends Todd, E and M Malone and R and G Malone! I waited in line for 45 minutes to get genuine gyros for lunch, but it was totally worth it! The food was delicious, and the kids dancing to Greek music was golden! They were hilarious as they jumped around and laughed! These pictures crack me up.

TWO!

2010-09-18T22:01:00.002-05:00

"I almost two." Sometime in June I started teaching Noah to say this, knowing that all too soon I would have to teach him, to drop the "almost." After some thinking and planning, Noah's second birthday bustled in with a bang! We had lots of friends and family over to help us with the celebration. The sad part of the day is that I didn't spend much time with the birthday boy at all; rather most of it preparing for the party. I must take note of this and change things accordingly in years to come. I couldn't have done it without the help of loved ones. Noah's Grams, Nana and Papa came in town to help celebrate, and before they had a chance to, I put them to work! Papa made all the ice cream and Grams, Nana and Daddy helped with all the other food and decorations!

Kids played, swam and smeared ice cream all over their faces, and the adults enjoyed some ice cream too, while we visited and laughed at our crazy children who were all on sugar highs!

When thinking about Noah's little life, this verse came to mind: "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." Psalm 139:14. Oh, does my soul know this! With as many things as I struggle with in my spiritual life, this is not one of them. I am so proud of Noah, and so thankful that God has made him into this special little person. He's speaking in sentences, he knows his colors, he's beginning to learn his shapes, he says, "yes mam," "no sir," "thank you" and "please," he gives the best hugs and kisses, he is generally obedient, and his imagination keeps our days filled with laughter. He is so "wonderfully made!" It amazes me that God knew he would be all of these things when he was yet in my womb. I am so thankful for this little person that gets to belong to me.

Here are some of the pictures from our fun birthday day...

Happy second birthday Noah. I can't wait to see what year three will bring us!

(pictures focused on the party decor, here.)

Walking with Daddy

2010-09-01T20:56:00.000-05:00

Every Monday night while I'm at dance class, Matt takes Noah for a walk to Gelato Di Riso. To get there, they have to walk past our local donut shop, and Matt snapped this picture this week. Noah is in his favorite car, with his new favorite hat (from his cousins), walking to eat one of his favorite foods...ice cream!

Rooftop Party

2010-08-31T23:24:00.001-05:00

Last Monday night, we spent the evening in our old hood, downtown. Oana's son, Mateo was having his 5th birthday party. It was such a wonderful evening...the temperature was so pleasant, the sky was clear, and the view was incredible from the top of their building. The kids had a great time playing together too. One of Noah's favorite parts was riding a little bike down the deck ramps. At one point I told him to "make it happen," and so every time after that, he would get to the top of the ramp, and before taking off he would call out, "make it happen!" He must have gone down that ramp a dozen times! I think it was fun for Matt to see Noah playing with his downtown friends too. It's kind of interesting to watch him develop into this little social bug. I'm getting closer to the ladies in my downtown mom's group, and I'm really enjoying those friendships.

This party was another great get together, and the bonus was that our hubbies got to meet!

(if anyone has the picture of all of us together, please send me a copy. i only got one picture, and it didn't turn out.)

Looking Out the Window

2010-08-29T23:02:00.002-05:00

Look at these two cutie pies! I don't know what was out there, but something sure had their attention. Sandra and I thought they looked adorable standing there together, so we whipped out our cameras! This was a sweet moment up until they began hiding in the curtains, and then bending the curtain rod! It literally bent in half after Noah fell down while holding tightly to one of the panels. We were letting them do it, so I couldn't exactly get upset! A few dollars later, we have a new curtain rod, and Noah is not allowed to play with the curtains anymore. Sorry buddy! Good time while it lasted.

All Aboard!

2010-08-22T22:39:00.000-05:00

Last Sunday, we took Noah to ride a mini steam engine train in Eureka. We had a great family day together. Noah just stared at the trains and the conductors...it seemed like it took him a while to get out of being in awe! Finally he loosened up a bit, and he would say things like, "all aboard" and "choo choo." And after we had a little break in the train ride, he said, "come on everybody" (wanting everyone to get back on the train). He also really liked going over a bridge. By the end of the ride, he was ready to go home, and he started asking for the Jeep! Such a mess.

buying the train tickets

noah was so intrigued by the real steam engine

walking on the train tracks during the ride "intermission"

10 things i'm loving

2010-08-17T09:28:00.001-05:00

i love
...that noah asks for a kiss when he's hurt.
...that he pretends the pillows on our bed are his "car," specifically with two doors (two side pillows).
...that noah and daddy run (with way too much energy for me) down the stairs in the morning.
...that noah remembers his grandparents. (grams and pops = ocean and the water slide, nana and papa = golf cart and boat.)
...that he knows the biblical characters on the front of his children's bible.
...that he can ask for specific books by name
...that he is finally saying please and thank you.
...that noah still says "happy baaarthday tyler" even though that was almost two months ago.
...that noah asks me to sing before putting him in bed.
...that he is starting to drink from a normal cup vs. the sippy (without mega spillage).

Don't Let Me Go

2010-08-13T22:37:00.000-05:00

This morning, as happens many Friday mornings, Noah did not want Matt to go to work. He didn't scream and cry, he simple hung on. He laid his little head on his daddy's shoulder, wrapped his arms around daddy's neck, and wouldn't let him go. Of course this broke both of our hearts, and Matt laid down on the couch with him for a bit. We were finally able to distract him with "Super Why," so that Matt could get out of here before lunch. So sad, but so sweet. I love that Noah loves Matt so much.

Peach Pickin'

2010-08-10T21:39:00.000-05:00

PEACHES!!!

"Nummy" peaches...Noah couldn't wait! He ate a total of three peaches today. (Tomorrow's diapers should be awesome.) We had a really fun day, but oh my goodness, it was one of the hottest days of the year. Mid-peach picking, I was sweating so much that my make-up was running in my eyes. And I'm not a huge sweater! Noah was also melting...his hair was wet, and he had little beads running down his forehead. He didn't seem to mind at all though. He just wanted to eat peaches and "dribe" the tractors.

Friend Jenn from our Downtown Mom's Group let me know about this Peach Picking Day, and then some girls from Mom Junket came too. We had a really good day gathering peaches, riding on the trailer, riding in the wagon, having lunch together and then a little custard to top it off. I think we were all exhausted, and ready to go home by the end of the day, but it was a really good time.

Summertime Fun

2010-08-09T22:32:00.003-05:00

Last Month:

We hung out with our friends from our Downtown Mom's Group. Everyone came over for play time and lunch at our house.

We also met the Downtown Moms at a local theater to watch a free movie, Ice Age. About halfway through, Noah decided he was more interested in climbing the stairs and messing with the lights on the wall than watching the movie!

This summer, Noah's been helping me in the kitchen. Here, he's helping me cut up some watermelon.

In this next shot, he decided that cutting the watermelon was an unnecessary step. He found a more direct method.

We took Noah to a new park a couple of weeks ago, and we didn't realize there was a fountain. If you would have seen Noah's excitement when he saw it, you wouldn't have been able to tell him no either! So even though I didn't have a change of clothes or even a towel, I let him go for it. After all, we were only a couple of minutes from home! He had a blast, and he rode home naked!

Just a cute shot of Noah and Parker the weekend of July 17th in front of Brian and Janet's house.

(another) Weekend Away

2010-08-08T22:26:00.001-05:00

One of the reasons I haven't posted any new pictures recently is because my camera is full, and I haven't put the pictures and videos on my computer to free up space. I'm not sure why this is hard for me to make happen, but it just is. Anyway, I figure I need to update, even without the photos, so that's what I'm doing!

We headed down to Nana and Papa's again this weekend. We visit a little more in the summer because Matt loves to ski and now Noah loves going out on the boat and swimming too. He especially loves driving the golf cart that takes us down to the lake, and he asked to do it at least every 10 minutes the entire time we were there! And of course Nana and Papa took him on many rides. He jumped off of the boat many times while we were on the lake too. Each time he had a huge smile on his face. He seems to be getting more and more comfortable with the life jacket on in the water. It can be cumbersome, but the more we do it, the more he learns to maneuver around in it better. He's kicking his legs pretty consistently now too.

This weekend, he ate "pocals" on the kitchen floor with Nana and had blueberry pancakes BOTH mornings we were there. He also likes watching "George" at their house. This morning, he said one of the longest sentences I think he's ever said..."want to go down the stairs and watch George." He put all of that together pretty clearly...I thought it was great. I also let him have chocolate milk for the first time. There was just a touch of chocolate syrup in the milk, but I didn't call it chocolate milk, instead I just said it was a treat. He took a few sips, realized that it was some form of chocolate, and then decided he was finished.

He has started saying "I don't want it" when he's finished with something, or when he just doesn't want something. It comes out real snotty sounding though, so I'm trying to teach him "No thank you." On Saturday, Nana bought him some new clothes from Baby Gap, so I was thrilled about that! She also got him this super cute little backpack, to which he responded "I don't want it." Rrrrrrrr...I do not like it a bit when he has that attitude. And, I'm a little at a loss as to how to respond to him when he talks that way. He's using his words, he's expressing what he's feeling; it's just rude. (I'm open to suggestions!)

Saturday night, Steve and Deb watched Noah for us so that we could have a date night. We were supposed to have a double date with Brian and Janet, but Tyler came down with a high fever, so they needed to stay home with him. After stopping at a couple antique shops, Matt and I still went to dinner, and then we went over to Jay and Sarah's to see their new old house. It's great...lots of projects to be done, but it's a really special house, with lots character, and I'm glad we got to check it out.

Sunday morning, we left the lake and headed to Brian and Janet's to say hello before coming back to the Lou. The boys got to play for a little while, Matt and Brian caught up, and Janet showed me what she's been doing for home school. Next stop was Harter House to stash up on some meat, and then we headed home. We got home, I made a quick dessert, and then we went to the Steele's for dinner. A dinner that took about a month to plan! We had a really nice time with them and the Malones: we ate a delicious lasagna, Noah took one significant spill off of the couch, the kids flew about 30 feet in the air on their monster swing, Joel made us these amazing Brazillian cocktails, we indulged in some chocolate dessert, and then the kids started breaking down because it was bedtime. This crazy weekend is not over, because while I'm staying up writing this blog, Matt is already in bed because he's leaving at 4am to go to a conference in KC.!

One busy busy weekend, but it was fun. We are always thankful for our family and friends.

Dog Sledding

2010-08-03T18:57:00.000-05:00

This is exactly what it look likes!

Every Monday night, while I'm taking my amazing cardio hip hop class, Matt takes Noah on a "car" ride. (This ride usually involves a stop at the local gelato cafe.) Last night, Matt decided to try dog sledding city style. You can tell that they've got a little speed going by the look of Noah's hair flying in the wind. I'm just glad Noah didn't end up with any road rash. Geez! Matt's usually the 'safe' one between the two of us, so I was quite surprised that he initiated this craziness. Kind of funny though!

The Fourth

2010-07-14T22:07:00.000-05:00

What a fantastic weekend! Started with a full day of Tyler-esque celebration...he turned three! We met at the park in the morning for the kids' party, and then we had a family party that evening at Brian and Janet's house. The boys had fun eating, playing and opening gifts together.

I feel like 40 years from now, I'll take a picture just like this, and it won't look that different.

Noah loved so many of Parker and Tyler's toys.

Parker and Noah chilling together watching Veggie Tales. Parker is an amazing big cousin. He's so sweet and nurturing with Noah. Such a good kid.

Noah and Tyler are playing the piano together. Tyler was singing "Jesus Loves Me." Noah thinks Tyler is hilarious and wants to do all the things he does. The two of them seem like they have similar personalities. Risk-taking, strong willed, hilarious little boys! They're going to be so much trouble when they're teens. I just can't think about that yet.

Aunt J thinks Noah has musician potential. She said that most little kids just bang on the piano, but Noah was hitting keys individually. That made me excited! I want him to love music, and so far it seems like he's on that path. Aunt J was teaching Noah "Jesus Loves Me" on the piano.

On Sunday, the Fourth, we spent the morning in church and the afternoon on the lake. Noah loves to "drive boat," which he talks about ALL the time! That and "drive cart," (driving the golf cart). He jumped off of the swim deck into the lake with little reservation, and then fell asleep on the way back to the dock. He had a blast! That is one lucky kid to have one set of grandparents who live on the lake and the other set who live at the beach.

A little Allstate boat insurance PR!

This is Noah's face of exuberance! It could be confused with a face of extreme unhappiness, but I assure you, he is having the time of his life!

Falling asleep with Nana.

We had taken a break from the water to let Noah rest and to make dinner, and then we headed back down to the lake to see the fireworks from the boat. Since I've know Matt, whenever we are in close proximity to his family on the Fourth, we go out on the boat to see the fireworks. We are surrounded by thousands of other boats, whose lights shine like little stars across the water. The twenty minute firework show goes off literally right over our heads, and once it's over all the boats share a celebratory honking of the horns! It's such a wonderful way to spend the night. Sadly, Noah fell asleep 5 seconds before the first firework went off. He was worn out from the day. I tried to wake him up, but he wasn't having it, and he slept on Nana for the rest of the evening.

Before falling asleep though, he enjoyed the boat ride out to the show.

The next day, Brian, Janet and the boys joined us at the lake. We swam, boated, and skied. It was quite the exciting day, because Parker and Tyler skied with Brian for the first time, Janet got up on skies for the first time, and Noah jumped off the dock for the first time (which is a 2-3 foot jump) into the water (with either Matt or I waiting for him of course)! We were so proud of his progress! He can blow bubbles and kick his legs. Hopefully he'll be swimming by next summer. And, it was really fun to watch our nephews brave up to the idea of skiing, because since before we had Noah, we've talked about teaching him early, and seeing Parker and Tyler do it made me anxious for watching my own little guy out on the water! Anyway, I don't have any pictures of this fun day because my camera was full. Such a bummer.

Great weekend!

Confessions

2010-07-12T22:37:00.002-05:00

Right now, I feel like I'm earning about a D+ at my "job." I feel like there are a hundred things I NEED to be doing, but that I'm not doing. Not just that I need to be doing, but that I WANT to be doing. I'm a total idealist, however, I'm not holding myself accountable to those standards that I've set. I'm not keeping my house as tidy as I'd like (and I'm sure the Mr. would like), I'm not teaching Noah his flashcards, I'm not doing enough projects with him, I'm not experimenting in the kitchen much at all, I'm not planning our meals, I haven't cleaned out my closets and files (which has been on my to do list for at least 6 months now), I'm not spending much time sewing, I'm not spending enough time exercising, I'm falling behind on my blog (which is my journal for our family and Noah, so kind of important!), I'm not finding and cutting coupons, I'm not reading my Bible, I'm not reading child development books...WHAT is my problem, and what the heck AM I doing?

Remember my post about stay at home moms, not staying at home? Well, I've decided that I've got to actually spend more time at home. My Noah is developing so fast right now. He's such a sponge, and I'm finding that even though I'm "home" I'm letting so many other distractions get in the way. I'm so frustrated with myself sometimes. My mind, my will and my heart don't seem to work too well together.

I've been thinking about this for a few days now, and working on small things here and there. (I have to list a few good things now, to balance out the tirade of confessions above!) On Saturday, I made Noah popsicles and I let him help me. He poured the mixture into the cups and then he stuck the sticks in. He really did! Instead of shooing him away, I pulled up a chair to the counter, let him stand on it and help me. He was so happy and proud, and I felt the same afterward. I was in no hurry and the counter is easily cleaned, so why not? He also likes to put clothes in the dryer, so I enlisted his help today! I can tell he gets a great sense of accomplishment from these small tasks. I also made it a point to do some scripture reading this morning. After having been a Christian for most of my life, I should know my Bible and my God much better than I do. This admission is heart breaking to actually see in words, but it's true, and I've got to stop feeling bad about it and make a change...a consistent change. And, on a lighter note, rather than leaving clean clothes on my bed to be folded at another time, I thought of my mom and her super organized ways, and folded them before doing anything else. A small thing, but it felt good!

I have to keep working on this. Our weeks are filled with so many good things, mainly hanging out with our friends doing various activities, and I don't want to push that aside either. How to balance???
I'm not really sure why I'm writing all of this on this forum. I think many of us want to be better at what we do, so perhaps I'm looking for comfort in others. I don't want to be a lone ranger; the only one making a D+ at my job!
I want to live my life with purpose and not just say on Fridays, "wow, that week went by fast." Noah slept with us last night, and I looked over at his peaceful face many times and thought, one day he's going to be a man. I'm sure I'll have some regrets about what I could or should have done, but mostly I want to be able to think that I did everything with him to the fullest of the abilities God has given me.

UPDATE: After reflecting on this post last night, I had an additional thought. This is not the first time I've felt this way, but I think I haven't been able to make consistent changes because I'm relying on my own strength to do it. I can't do anything I want to do on my own. I'm way too unreliable. I think the Lord is teaching me that I need to put my dependence on Him and not on myself. Darrin preached this weekend on 1 Thessalonians, and one of the verses says that "we are not trying to please men, but God who tests our hearts." Although, I'm taking that exact verse a bit out of context, it still speaks to me, because I feel like I've been trying to be the woman I want to be, rather than who God wants me to be. I don't think there is anything wrong with my ambitions and honestly, I believe that the way I want to be falls in line with who God has intended me to be. But the question is, who am I doing it for? Myself? My friends? My family? Not good enough. Everything I do for myself and others should ultimately and firstly be in service to my God. For some reason this is hard to keep at the forefront, but it is so much more motivating when I can remember it! After all, He is the one who gave me my friends and family and any ability I might have. I'll keep thinking on this...

Florida Wrap Up

2010-07-12T21:44:00.001-05:00

First of all, let me just tell you that I can't get these pictures in order to save my life, and I'm too annoyed with dealing with them to delete them and start anew! So, they will just have to be out of order!

The second half of our trip to Florida was just as fun as the first. We visited the beach again, and we also went to this amazing kids' water park called, Coconut Cove. We will definitely be back there on future trips. Noah played hard for almost 4 hours straight. Unfortunately, Grams and I were following Noah around the whole time, and a camera would have gotten wet, so I have no pictures from that afternoon. But, it was so cool!

On this trip, Grams taught Noah how to make a fish face, and we both worked on getting him to hold his breath...both cracked us up! Noah also collected shells for his cousins, Parker and Tyler, at the beach. He played more on his "water slide" with Pops, and he had a good time with some new toys that Grams bought him, especially his farm. One night was particularly memorable...Pops was putting Noah to bed, they were reading through Noah's little Bible, and they turned to the story of David and Goliath. Noah, pointed and said "Goliath" as if this story was one he had read a thousand times! Pops was a little blown away, and I was a proud proud mama!

Grams and Pops both tried to help in getting Noah to say "please," but they had about as much luck as we've had. And that would be none. Noah also decided to call Pops "Papa" the WHOLE time. Not once did he say his name correctly. And he totally can, because he's called him Pops for months now. Stinker! Oh, and to top off the negative behavior list I seem to have going here, Noah starting hitting, a lot. (Which has since curbed quite a bit, thankfully!) That is one stubborn little boy we have.

On to the out of order pictures!

Grams and Pops, Again!

2010-06-25T20:17:00.000-05:00

Yep, we're back in Florida! I wanted to get in one more trip to Grams and Pops before we have to start paying for Noah's passage, so here we are! Grams found an awesome park for Noah that had a carousel.

Pops bought Noah a Slip n' Slide, and he loves it!

Of course once he got to the bottom he just wanted to play in the water.

Today we went to the beach, and Pops made Noah a race car in the sand. The same kind he made for Ben and I when we were younger, and a little to our surprise, Noah played in it for a while. We expected him to get some sand on his hands and be done, but he sat in the driver's seat ready to go. ( He doesn't like getting "yucky.") He started out smiling, but saying "yucky, yucky, yucky..." So funny! But he really enjoyed playing in the car. Thanks Pops!

Girls' Weekend

2010-06-22T21:21:00.000-05:00

The only sad thing about our girls' weekend in Chicago, is that it's over! We had such a blast. Chicago, good food, awesome shopping, tons of laughs and closer friendships...It was amazing!

We...

road-tripped with Erin and I at the wheel

talked about samurais and first kisses

ate at Portillo's

shopped at a powerless Ikea...it was hot and dark but we still managed to shop for 4 hours

grabbed a slice of Chicago style pizza at Gino's East

got a little taste of the Jersey Shore just down the road from our hotel

night shopped at Macy's and Urban Outfitters

had cocktails and dessert at Cheesecake Factory

learned that Lucy is hilarious

kept each other awake with snoring and a heartburn-inducing, unborn baby

shopped at Ikea...again, power was back on

shopped at Woodland Mall

learned that Catherine used to be good at hiring skanks and hoes

ate at Rainforest Cafe

shopped at the Chicago Outlets

drove through an adorable little town...Plainfield (it was not plain)

ate delicious Mexican food at a cute little restaurant

got a first hand look at Sandra's Latina charm

laughed at our server who should have never been hired as such

returned back to st. louis at midnight

rearranged vehicles and all of our goods, and headed home

It was a really good weekend. I feel like I got much closer to these girls, and of course I stocked up on tons of fabric and various household goodies.

(My name scribbled on the wall at Gino's East.)

Our Week in Pictures...

2010-06-18T10:11:00.000-05:00

Naked ice cream eating after a hard afternoon of swimming! Good times.

One morning I turned on PBS for Noah, and I went upstairs to get ready for the day. When I came down to check on him, this is what I found. As cute as it was, I think this pretty much defines the reason the TV should be limited!

Reese and Noah having PB&J at a Downtown Mom's get-together.

Niko and Noah becoming good buddies.

This morning Noah started doing this. I don't know who taught it to him, but it sure as heck wasn't me!

He was pretty happy with himself.

Today

2010-06-16T23:43:00.000-05:00

This morning, I was still dazed from my 11pm dosage of Nyquil, so Noah snuggled with me while I napped. He watched Super Why.

Today, Noah and I danced to John Mayer. He laughed.

Today, I was a horse and Noah was a rider. He got bucked off many times. The horse had to retire.

Today, Noah and I got "stuck" under his living room chair.

Noah has recently started saying, "what happened to __________?" For instance, he'll throw his truck down, and say, "what happened to truck?" I will reply, "well, you threw your truck on the floor, that's what happened to it." The examples could go on... cup, cars, books, anything...

Today, Noah all of a sudden decided that he loves his stuffed puppy, Cordy Roy. When I went in his room after his nap today, he had thrown him out of the crib and was saying, "doggie, doggie." I realized he was talking about Cordy, so I handed it to him, and he held on to Cordy for the next hour or so. Matt said he was asking about Cordy this morning too. He's been sleeping with Cordy for over a year now. It's bizarre, but for some reason, I really like him having that connection. May be it makes him seem like a baby to me again. I don't know. It's cute though.

I was talking to Janet today about how frustrating it is to take Noah somewhere that is solely for his enjoyment, and then for him to be whiney and grumpy. Today we went to the fountains at Tower Grove, and he got really whiney because he wanted to go play on the playground instead of the fountains. I took him to the playground for a bit, and then took him back to the water and he threw a little fit. I was not in the mood to deal with that kind of behavior today, so we packed up and headed out.

(FYI: I'm trying to write down more of our every day happenings, even when I don't have new pictures to post.)

"It's Cute"

2010-06-14T21:08:00.000-05:00

A couple of days ago, Noah walked into our closet, held out the arm of one of my blazers, and said, "it's cute."

I laughed really hard, and then thought that perhaps it's time I scale back the trips to Baby Gap.

I Want to Remember...

2010-06-11T23:05:00.000-05:00

that Noah...

kisses us goodnight through the stairway spindles.
stands up in his crib and yells, "mommy, daddy or bi-per (diaper)!" each morning.
asks, "what's that" about everything, multiple times.
counts, but he'll start somewhere between four and ten.
yells out, "daddy!" when Matt comes down the stairs each morning.
crawls on top of us, bounces up and down, and says, "horse."
loves playing with his trucks, wagon, big car, and lightening mcqueen car.
also likes to "hammer" things (things like walls, floors, cabinets, and toys) with the hammer pops made him.
absolutely refuses to say "please."
just started saying "popcal" (popsicle)
says, "outside boys" when he wants to go outside (pops unknowingly taught him this).
still cuddles on my shoulder at night before I put him in his crib.
kisses the phone when saying goodbye to any of his grandparents.
says, "tweet tweet" whenever he sees a bird.
learned how to jump on Sesame Street and now he likes to jump down the stairs. With each step he says, "jump!"
has started to recognize that babies are "sad" when they cry.
says, "I'm okay" after he has fallen down...even when he really isn't okay.
says, "ready home" when we're out and he thinks it's time to leave.
says, "Reese, Aidan" when we get to a destination.
loves water, buttons, veggie tales, and trucks.

(This picture was taken while he was experiencing his first watermelon of the season. He loved it and asks for it everyday! Like mother like son!)

The Sandidge's Came!

2010-06-04T08:13:00.001-05:00

Sarah and Jay came to visit us last week for three full days before continuing their trek to Ohio. We haven't spent that amount of time under one roof since they lived with us (several years ago when they were in transition back to Springfield from Nashville). We had such a lovely time togther. It made me homesick for my friend. Whenever we get to spend any amount of time together we always grieve about the distance between us. We dreamed a little about what it would be like to live in a compound-like situation. Everyone helping with everyone else's children, sharing the cooking, the chores, the farm responsibilities (because of course we would have chickens and a cow)...

Well, back to reality. If I can't live in the same city as my bff (or on a compound), at least we can have visits. Sarah, Jay and Matt had to work during the week, so one of the days, I took Lula and Noah to lunch and Walmart with Shanna, Aidan and Reese. I loved it! And I think Lu had a good time. At lunch, Aidan asked Lula, "where's your mom?" "where's your dad?" He was talking to her and offering her his crackers, just like she was another one of his friends. That kid cracks me up! Lula was happy to take his crackers. Later, I had a little moment of "how am I going to get two kids into Walmart when there's only one seat in the cart" panic. I quickly remembered that I had the Bjorn in the trunk, so I put Lu in that and Noah in the cart. They played happily together as I shopped, and I thought to myself, "I can totally do this!"

During their visit we also, took walks, had a picnic in the park for Will Malone's birthday, played in the Tower Grove fountain, visited the Cupcakery, went shopping, and watched a few movies (It's Complicated, An Education, and about 5 minutes of 2012...don't waste your money on that one).

Lula and Noah bonded, as is obvious in these last photos. They were giving each other goodbye kisses. So cute!

Hello Summer

2010-05-25T14:23:00.000-05:00

On Sunday we welcomed the summer to St. Louis. We celebrated summer's entrance with swimming, friends, grilling and ice cream! Good times.

noah, lee and claire playing poolside.

this picture makes me laugh really hard. noah clearly thought leaning on claire like this was hilarious. she didn't think it was quite as funny.

noah discovered he could straddle the side of the pool. he would bounce up and down and say, "horse, horse!"

noah thought he needed to pick up olivia...she wasn't a fan of that idea.

noah and lee eating ice cream cones and teagan waiting for the drippings.

we (the parents) totally took advantage of our kids' addictions to veggie tales by letting them eat dinner while watching. although we felt a little guilty about allowing this, it was so nice to have an adult dinner in peace!

Go Duke! Go Ben!

2010-05-24T00:09:00.000-05:00

The last bit of our trip was spent in Durham, North Carolina where my brother Ben lives. He and Marsa` have spent three long years there so far, while Ben has been working on his Masters in Divinity. Finally, this tedious, but rewarding part of their lives is over, and we all went to celebrate with them. We had a fabulous time and made some great memories. A few of them include:

-Noah saying "Uncle Ben" and "Aunt Sa` Sa`"
-Noah eating and spitting ice into one of the drink buckets at the grad party
-Noah calling for "Grams" or "Pops" when he woke up in the mornings
-Noah sitting quietly through Ben's whole graduation ceremony (save the one time where he called for Aunt Sa` Sa` who was sitting several seats down)
-helping Marsa` decorate for the grad party
-Noah jumping into a pool without prodding (Matt was there to catch of course!)
-Me and Matt's date night at a Bull's game
-Noah learning to "drive" and then asking for it ALL the time

Warning: LOTS of pictures!

going to pick up daddy from the airport

playing frisbie with uncle ben at the duke gardens

noah playing around the gardens

marsa` and ben's house was ready for the graduation party...so pretty!

ben and marsa`, on their front steps, before the big shin dig...such a good looking couple.

miss karla jordan

hanging out with daddy at the party

noah played in this ice bucket for a really long time. he likes chewing ice like his dad. gives me chills!

party pictures

pops sign towards the top of the building...cute!

ben had just opened his big grad gift...a trip for two to nyc for the us open

noah with his "aunt sa` sa`" (check out the hair style she gave him.)

time for the actual graduation/hooding ceremony.

my mom and marsa`s mom, ellen, in the duke chapel

pops and noah in the chapel

our desperate attempt at keeping noah busy while waiting for the ceremony to start. why do i love old doors so much? especially with noah in front of them? so cute!

this is a man on a mission.

mommy and noah

karla and noah

mommy and noah....it's just about to start!

aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! i love this picture!

ben walking down the aisle during the processional

ben getting hooded

on our way out!

family picture time

pops dropped us at the airport. noah is giving goodbye kisses.

Goodbye spring trip! You were good to us. Thanks to Pops and Grams for taking such good care of us while we were with them! We miss you both immensely. Thanks to Marsa` and Ben for getting us a rockin' loft to camp in...for free! It was fun to see Noah fall in love with both of you. Thanks to my hubby for loving and supporting my family, and letting me spend tons of time with them!

Florida Trip, Part 5

2010-05-11T22:11:00.001-05:00

Mother's Day was busy but fabulous! We started it off with Bible study and service at my dad's new church, then he took us to Carraba's for our Mother's Day celebration. Next on the agenda was Noah's nap and when he woke up, we exchanged Mom's Day gifts. I got a sweet card from my Noah that Grams and Pops helped him make, and a lovely card filled with some shopping money from Mom and Dad. Not to mention that earlier in the week, Matt sent my Mom and I flowers with sweet notes. After the exchange, we went to the beach again, and Noah wandered around, went into the "WAH-TER" with Pops, stood on a random guy's skim board and watched some surfers do their thing. Earlier in the day, we decided that it was a Coldstone kind of a day, so after the beach we picked some up...it was our dinner, and I could have that kind of dinner every night! Although I missed Matt, it was a wonderful second Mother's Day for me, and I was so happy I got to actually celebrate it with my own Mom.

Post beach ice cream is the best!

Florida Trip, Part 4

2010-05-11T20:15:00.002-05:00

Five minutes from their house, Grams and Pops have the Green Cay Wetlands. We all visited and walked a mile and a half around together. Noah loved seeing the "quack-quacks (ducks)," the "tweet-tweets (birds)," and the "aarrrhhhs (alligators)." He split his time walking, riding in the stroller and sitting on Pops shoulders. Pops was running into the tree branches, and Noah was loving it. He kept saying "trees, trees!!" A few days later, while I spent a little time at Ikea, Grams took him back for another round. This time they walked around again, and then spent a lot of time in the museum, where Noah listened to bird sounds and watched the frogs, turtles and baby alligators.

On Monday, mom, Noah and I went to The Cheesecake Factory for a Mother's Day lunch since my dad refused to let me "take her out" on Sunday. (He treated us to lunch at Carraba's...more on this day later!) We had a delicious lunch and snapped a few shots before going in.